Back to Homepage | Back to Jokes Page

Professor Quotes: Spring 1999

Professor Katsaggelos - ECE B43 Signals and Systems
"Something is wrong with the exam.  I can add 40 points to every grade if needed.  Something is wrong when I give an easy problem and no one gets it right!" (Katsaggelos on B43 midterm average 43/100, 5-7-99)
Professor Riesbeck - CS C11 Data Structures
"You die in here (LR3) and live electronically." (Riesbeck, 3-30-99)
"Like on the back of a shampoo bottle.   Rinse, lather, repeat, of course then you'd be stuck washing your hair for eternity." (Riesbeck, 3-30-99)
"Maybe it's not lucking out, maybe it works!" (Riesbeck, 3-30-99)
"You're right!  There is no bug!   Everybody's right, I'm wrong! <slaps himself in the face>" (Riesbeck, 4-1-99)
"You try several doors and can't get out, so it maybe tech because it always happens.  Let's try another door, and finally I realize it really is tech and there's no way out!" (Riesbeck, 4-13-99)
"You can't back off.  You can say 'just disregard that stupid thing I just said.'  But that doesn't work in juries either." (Riesbeck on iterators, 4-13-99)
Professor Vandiver - CLA B60 Classical Mythology
"It's a double standard, A guy who sleeps with 10 women in a quarter might be looked up upon.  But what do you call a girl who sleeps with 10 guys in a quarter?  Yeah."  (Vandiver, 5-13-99)
Professor Hesnchen - ECE C46 Embedded Systems Design
"It's a computer that you take to bed with you." (Henschen, 3-29-99)
"Some people say timing is everything.   I don't say that." (Henschen, always 5 min. late to class, 3-31-99)
"Like marriage, when they pronounce you man and wife, BPTHH, that's the falling edge." (Henschen on ALE, 3-31-99)
"I'm not an artist, don't think I'm much of anything else either." (Henschen, 3-31-99)
"Life is a tradeoff.  You heard it from me first, or 108th.  Life is a tradeoff." (Henschen, 5-7-99)
"Students are just dozing, and when the teacher wants to make an important point <slaps hand hard on desk, then shakes his hand in pain>  Wake up!! Just kidding, just to get your attention." (Henschen on start bits, 5-7-99)
"Either I have to stop going to the gym or we need stronger chalk." (Henschen after breaking chalk, 5-12-99)
"I better erase some of this or I won't be able to get it on.  <smirks from the class>"  (Henschen, 5-14-99)
"Don't worry, I didn't inhale!" (Henschen smoking chalk, 5-14-99)
Student:  "Isn't it high and low?"  Henschen:  "Oh, I never get high." (5-14-99)

Questions, Comments, Suggestions? Email or ICQ UIN# 3381854
Last Updated: